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Sex (California Style)
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Written by Redryder   
Thursday, 31 March 2005

ImageHow to get members of the opposite sex to smile at you in California ?  Smile at them. Their responses will be automatic.  Californians are the smilest people in the world !

HOW CALIFORNIANS FIND PARDNERS

The stoplight pickup ...

Probably the most popular and original of all the pickups in California. As you glide to a stop at the light, begin glancing to the right/left. Someone pulls up next to you. You make the tradional eye contact. A potential sex pardner?

First, let's analyze the facts you already know. You KNOW what she drives. A BMW? A Porche? A Yugo???

Next, observe her licence plate AND FRAME (crucial) - this can tell you where she's "from" ("Happiness is living in Barstow"), what sport she likes ("Happiness is Climbing rocks"), marital statis ("Happiness is Being single") and if she has a vanity plate ..... her name (Buffy?). With a little experience you can even learn to judge her height/leg length by the position of her body relitive to the steering wheel.
Last Updated ( Saturday, 11 November 2006 )
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The Sound of One Hand Clapping
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Written by Redryder   
Friday, 11 March 2005
ImageThis age old question I beleive is actually the coy recasting of a famous Zen Master KOAN, or riddle, Zen Masters use to train their students.  The KOAN in question, sevised by the famous Zen Master Hakuin (1686-1779) is as follows :In clapping both hands, a sound is heard. What is the sound of one hand? (In casual discussion this is usally corupted to : What is the sound of one hand clapping?)

Unsophisticated persons are generally inclined to answer with something like, "Half a clap," which, of course, signifies that they have not yet achieved Budda nature.
After several years of dedicated meditating, however, they learn the correct response, which is to face the questioner, assume a correct Budist posture, and without a word thrust one hand forward.
I learn this from "The sound of the one hand : 281 Zen Koans With Answers" by Hau Hoo, which is my idea of an admirably no-bullshit approach to cosmic enlightenment.
Last Updated ( Tuesday, 14 November 2006 )
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Lookin' Out For You
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Written by Doc Wright   
Friday, 22 April 2005
ImageI see that you have morphed from a throbbing-veined heart-attack-in-waiting into a semi-literate person willing to post your wrath on your favorite bloggy ..... Congratulations.

That might be Step #2 on the road to recovery. I understand that it is frustrating to deal with any combination of the following: an old lady with multiple, perhaps expired coupons; a person who cannot count and brings at least 20 items into the line, including a feminine hygiene product that needs a price-check; or the tired and frazzled cashier that is moving, robot-like, through the 14-hour shift that allows her to feed and dress her 7 children thanks to the patronage of suited and loafered assholes like yourself. You're standing there so irate, so convinced everyone is just an inconsiderate moron, yet you're the same person driving solo in the carpool lane then cutting over the other 3 just in time to exit at a brake-squealing rate, so you get to work on time to make the money that empowers you to fume at others in a grocery store. I.E., who are you to judge?
Last Updated ( Saturday, 11 November 2006 )
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